Stepmother does the Sloppy Swish.

Oh, hey, it’s dawn o’clock! A most reasonable time to do a show, methinks! I definitely got into theatre because mornings are a thing at which I excel, and my imminent performance will in no way resemble that of a drugged-out, vacant dance-zombie, like the one below:

I had an insane dream last night about these otherworldly visitors who sent up this huge beacon of, like, pure sound at the Vatican; it was rising in a pillar from the ground to the sky, rippling like one of those heat mirages you sometimes see on the road, but cylindrical and massive, and part of it cut through the front of St. Peter’s Basilica. It stayed like that for a few days while this weird, benign message played and the whole world was like “um, WTF is this?”, and then this very clear proclamation of doom came through, all “HEY DUDES JUDGEMENT BEGINS ON TUESDAY ENJOY YOUR LAST COUPLE OF DAYS,” and the sound-pillar destroyed the front of the church, and the big dome came toppling down into the piazza below, and on the ground these images of Jesus began to appear, and basically it was a concrete signal of the biblical end-times. I was so freaked out when I woke up that the first thing I did was check CNN.com to make sure there was no mention of either alien sound-pillars or Jesus. Then I looked up St. Peter’s Basilica and was mildly freaked out that my brain had recreated the dome and surrounding area perfectly, right down to the columns circling the base of the dome, even though it’s not a place with which I’d say I am particularly familiar. MAYBE I AM A PROPHET AND THE WORLD WILL END? ON TUESDAY? Or maybe bacon before bed was a bad choice. Regardless: I am currently eating more bacon.

I have a sneaking suspicion that I am the only person on the planet who watches Boardwalk Empire, which is a shame, because it turns out that show is where they keep all the acting.

NaBloPoMo 2012
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2 thoughts on “Stepmother does the Sloppy Swish.

  1. I read this before I saw last week’s SNL (which I didn’t manage to see until yesterday). So when I finally saw the Sloppy Swish video, I howled with laughter – both because it was funny and because I was imagining you doing it in full Stepmother drag.

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